The Bathroom Attendant

Here in New York City, many bars and restaurants are trying their best to help the economy by employing people to watch you use the facilities and "help you wash your hands." I have never met one person that actually thinks this is a good idea...

First, let's look at it from the consumer's point of view: Sure, people may love the convenience of having a pseudo candy shop waiting for you in the same room you relieved yourself, but other than that - I cannot think of any positive attribute of this so-called job. The incredible pressure to tip the "attendant" merely for supplying you with a hand towel makes it so uncomfortable that sometimes one may just avoid washing his/her hands altogether - which - in it's own right makes the world a much worse place.

Now, from the actual employee's standpoint: I mean, is there really a job that is lower on the totem pole? Confined to a room in which the entire purpose is to host and then dispose of human extrament seems more like a method of torture rather than a way to earn money. Furthermore, the only interaction you have while in that hell hole is either with slurring, drunkin fools or people who are trying to avoid you. If you can seriously think of a less desirable job - please elaborate in the comments below.

And finally, from the employer's point of view: Do these people actually believe that costumers value these services? Can they seriously not think of a more valuable way to dedicate resources towards? And what is the job description and interview process like? "Um...stand there for a few minutes, I'm gonna fart constantly, and I'd like to see how you react..." In all seriousness, a few months back there was some "industry controversy" over the way employers compensated these folks. This article explains that some owners were literally pimping out their restrooms to bathroom attendants...I mean - is the market in that much demand?

I don't get it - and I don't think I ever will. There are certain services out there, which may or may not seem like such an extreme inconvenience - such as valeting your car, serving your meal, or setting up chairs on the beach at a resort - but, I truly don't mind someone making a living that way (I've actually worked as all of those, personally). When it comes to washing my hands after using the restroom, however, please just leave me alone.


Anonymous said...

You forgot to mention that you were also a Bar Mitzvah dancer. Oh dear friend.


Anonymous said...

I hate these guys as well. I have a stage fright problem to begin with, and the last thing I need is some diminuitive wetback staring at me while i drain the main vein.

Joel Joyce Jon!

Anonymous said...

Jizz mopper has to be a worse job. Though you do get unlimited porn.


Anonymous said...

assistant crack whore

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